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Khonsu The Wanderer

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“Khonsu: The Wanderer of Moon Magic in Ancient Egypt”

In ancient Egypt, the God Khonsu was known as the moon deity. The name “Khonsu” means “The Wanderer”. Moon magic was an important topic in ancient Egypt, and it played a central role in the magical system, which was based on the lunar calendar.

The Egyptian Moon God Khonsu

Khonsu, the wanderer of moon magic in ancient Egypt, being a Lunar deity, is not the only one, for the ancient Egyptians this would be the first month of Summer which is also where some of us are now.  In the Egyptian tongue or the late version of it, the word is Pachons which you can break down into an Egyptian phrase per-en-khonsu  “ the one of Khonsu” which can be contracted to Pachons.

In the Egyptian worldview, each month of the lunar cycle was dedicated to a specific deity, as exemplified by the month of Khonsu. While some deities were replaced or lost over time, the original concept remains: every month, throughout the seasons, holds special significance for a particular deity. Khonsu, the moon god, continues to be honoured in this lunar month.

Moon Magic

The Wanderer is an obvious reference to the moon’s fast-moving and irregular cycle.  Egyptian Luna deities are,  I would say, invariably male. Other examples would be Horus and Set. This shows, as people have long recognized, that there’s no simple equation of males being solar and females being lunar, which is sometimes heard within the Neo-Pagan Theology and other theologies as well.  Perhaps the metaphor of male and female as plus and minus, maybe you’d say for the Egyptians that wasn’t quite as important. It wasn’t the only way that they represented this important idea of a binary relationship between things.

Within Egyptian culture, a binary relationship between a pair of gods is a very important motif. But it doesn’t necessarily mean that they have to be male and female. It’s an option but there are other ways of showing the same thing. And just to confuse things even more, the categories of male and female are a little bit more flexible within the Egyptian system and it would be possible to find a male lunar deity who has what is usually thought of as female attributes such as the capacity to “give birth”.

As Set gives birth to Thoth, one Moon God gives birth to another. This is a very interesting piece of mythology which we probably have to go into sometime, but we’ll leave that for now, because it’s such a rich area. As I said, this interplay of important principles often uses sexual metaphors but they can be male/female male/male or female/female and other counterparts and there can also be a sexual aspect that is just not the kind of strict male / female modality, which for them was not the only game in town. 

Quite a lot of interactions between the Egyptian gods are between those nominally of the same gender, male and male or female and female and the homoerotic aspect of that was not avoided by the Egyptians it’s just not thought to be anything you always had to comment on. Or they may have seen it as just part of life as far as they were concerned.  So for instance the sun god Ra, the nocturnal sun can be another way of referring to the Moon. In this mythology, the nocturnal sun, the Sun at midnight, is the Moon. And he has an important union to consummate with another underworld deity, the lord of the dead or Osiris. And when they come together and form a new entity, there’s a kind of sexual frisson to it, which they just didn’t feel that they had to comment on.

Conclusion:

Khonsu, a lunar deity, marks the beginning of summer for ancient Egyptians, a concept preserved in the term “Pachons.” This aligns with the Egyptian belief that each lunar month is dedicated to a specific deity, exemplified by Khonsu’s enduring connection as the moon god. The epithet “The Wanderer” references the moon’s dynamic cycle, with Egyptian lunar deities predominantly portrayed as male, like Horus and Set. This defies the simplistic notion of males as solar and females as lunar, challenging binary interpretations in theology. Egyptian culture embraces fluidity in gender and deity attributes, allowing for male lunar deities with traditionally feminine traits. This complexity extends to mythology, where interactions between deities transcend gender norms, including homoerotic undertones, as seen in Ra’s nocturnal guise symbolizing the moon. Explore the multifaceted nature of Egyptian theology, where the interplay of gods reflects a rich tapestry of symbolism and meaning.

More on Khonsu (Videos) :

The Wandering Moon

The Wanderer, Khonsu Moon

 

Ritual Year Ancient Egypt Course

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“Explore the fusion of Hindu Tantrik and Khemetic perspectives in ‘Tankhem,’ a transformative course in ancient Egyptian magic. Tailored for witches, natural magicians, pagans, and tantriks alike, this course offers a unique approach to unravelling the mysteries of ancient Egypt’s magical heritage. Dive into the depths of this ancient Egyptian magic course and unlock the secrets of the ages.”

Course Aims:

Embark on a journey to unlock the mysteries of Ancient Egyptian Magical Religion through an in-depth exploration of its reconstructed Ritual Year, which consists of 12 “god-bearing” months.

Course Leader:

Guided by Mogg Morgan, a distinguished Companion of Seth and Knight of Shamballa, renowned author of over a dozen books on magick. Immerse yourself in his wealth of knowledge and expertise. Additionally, delve into his insightful videos on YouTube @EgyptianMagick.

Objectives:

  • Develop a comprehensive understanding of Egyptian culture, delving deep into its magickal practices from foundational principles to advanced techniques.
  • Attune to the rhythms of ancient cosmic and life cycles, fostering a heightened sensitivity to the interconnectedness of the universe.
  • Acquire practical skills essential for embarking on the journey toward immortality and spiritual resurgence.

Outline:

Twelve modules including video lecture.

Module 1: MesoRe – Ra and the New Year

 MesoRe – Ra and the New Year and the Golden Dawn. Who are you? There were two major cults in Egypt and the sun god was one of them. His/her birth at the turning point of the year was a hugely significant magick event at a micro and macrocosmic level. It also functions as an entry into the entire year. If joining the course late then this module will be sent together with the appropriate month module. Drawing down the sun, opening rites and calls. The module reveals many hidden aspects of the moment and also acts as an opening rite for the entire sequence. Printouts, extra and first assignment, Feedback on that.

Module 2: Tekh – The Cup and Seth’s Magick

Tekh – the name of this month is literally “The Cup” which has many important connotations, to do with the Cup of Imbibition. Also intoxication, hence its connection with the Egyptian god Seth. So an exploration of the magick of the god Seth and related Typhonian entities such as Apophis. Ritual work with what used to be called exorcism but really about ecstatic cults such as the Zar. Assignments.

Module 3: Min – Exploring Sexual Magick and Life Force

Min – The Egyptian Pan. One of Egypt’s oldest gods. A first look at ideas of sexual magick and the life force. An ancient giant who lies buried just below the surface. He reminds us of the “golden couples” whose coming together is the driving force of transformation and transcendence with the Egyptian cosmological schema.

Module 4: Hathor and Isis – Lunar Blessings and Alchemical Practices

Hathor, and sometimes Isis. The Lunar Blessing. The idea of an alchemical body is connected in Egypt with this archaic goddess and techniques to do with the magical record. Also how to install different divine principles in their respective body realms. Her great book of life, how your name gets in there and how its return date can be altered.

Module 5: Osiris and Sokar – Alchemy and Resurrection Magick

Osiris and Sokar. Alchemy and resurrection magick. Work with Hathor brings us to the cult of Osiris and a primary corpus of beliefs that form the basis of what in later times was known as alchemy but is cited at the crossroads and are the ultimate secrets of body magick.

Module 6: Neith – Ancestral Magick and Rebirthing

Neith, the ancestral, grandmother. All these goddesses have something in common, rebirthing the future self, This is about ancestral magick … reacting back to the first generations of gods. Shu and Tefnut the biogenesis.

Module 7: Nwt – Exploring Stella Magick and Constellations

Nwt, the Star Goddess, explores the several secret books of this ubiquitous goddess, the books of day and of night, the book of Nwt which form part of the primary corpus. Stella magick and the drawing down of constellations.

Module 8: Anubis – Channeling and Underworld Journeys

Anubis the psychic god, the one who moves between ours and the underworld. We must know a lot about this shapeshifter who brings the others to us. We learn channelling and “ordinary trance” from him. 

Module 9: Renenutet – Unveiling Ancient Serpent Power

Renenutet, ancient serpent power. For the Egyptians, Serpents helped to represent the female reproductive organs – so the manipulation of the ancient power begins, with the equivalent of the middle pillar and “chakra” exercises of classical cultures. So for instance the serpent on the forehead is the well-known parallel to the ajna or third eye centre of Tantrik lore.

Module 10: Khonsu – Dream Incubation and Lunar Influences

Khonsu, the wandering moon god, dream incubation. The Moon god explained. The Hidden Moon within and how it moves through the microcosmic, the body and the macrocosm, the outer world.

Module 11: Horus and Sobek – Practical Application in Daily Life

Horus, and Sobek. A detailed examination of this important god, its long history and mythology but always with an eye on what we can use in our daily lives, in the magical practice. Rituals and assignments.

Module 12: Tawaret – Anchoring Chaos and Ritual Cycles

Tawaret .. anchoring chaos. What the Greeks and others called an omphalos, or navel in some greater sense. Think also of belly breathing at a microcosmic level, or centre. If you consider her Hippo form, very heavy and solid, The significance as the anchoring of the ritual year, the fixing of a point that gives us leverage in what is to come. The ritual cycle, whatever form it takes, forms a celestial horizon around the initiates in their extended temple … Who she is is explained in great detail along with appropriate rituals.

Bonus Module: Thoth – Hermeticism and Ancient Magick

Moreover, as a bonus, delve into the realm of Thoth, a wandering magician, and explore the depths of hermeticism. This module is strategically inserted into the sequence at the most fitting juncture – discover why as you progress through the course.

Furthermore, understanding and integrating oneself with the ancient Egyptian ritual year is crucial to unlocking its hidden magick. Symbolically, the Sphinx, with its four feet, resonates with the cyclic nature of the year. Each month is represented by one of these feet, embodying the ebb and flow of time and cosmic energies.

Central to this course is an online lecture spanning one hour, delivering indispensable insights tailored to each month’s essence. Supplementing this core material is additional ad-hoc content accessible online.

Enrol now to access twelve meticulously crafted modules, with a complimentary thirteenth module dedicated to Thoth. Keep an eye out for the soon-to-be-published start date, likely coinciding with the Egyptian New Year around the Summer Solstice. Rest assured, all details will be comprehensively explained.

Pay here $365

Payments and refunds

One instalment of $365 is to be paid in advance

Refunds within 30 days of the beginning of the course of the remaining credit.

About the Facilitator Mogg Morgan

Extras

Course Book

Demonic Horoscope

Readings/One-on-One

The Anubis ritual

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The Anubis ritual is based on an ancient Egyptian ritual which is similar to a seance. The priest/ess of Anubis invokes Anubis’s Godform into the medium which will channel Anubis’s knowledge concerning the other deities which will be invited into the “table”.

This year we invite to the table: Geb the God of the Earth, and Nuit – the Goddess of the sky (Geb & Nuit are lovers and the parents of Osiris, Set, Isis, Nephtis and Horus the Elder). As is the time of Green Magick we also think that we have to invite the God Min – which is the most ancient form of the God Pan.

Min

Min is an ancient Egyptian god whose cult originated in the predynastic period (4th millennium BCE). He was represented in many different forms but was most often represented in male human form, shown with an erect penis which he holds in his right hand and an upheld left arm holding a flail.

As the central deity of fertility and possibly orgiastic rites, Min became identified by the Greeks with the god Pan. One feature of Min worship was the wild prickly lettuce Lactuca serriola (the domestic version of which is Lactuca sativa (lettuce)), which has aphrodisiac and opiate qualities and produces latex when cut, possibly identified with semen.

Celebrations of Min’s birthday are recorded on Egypt’s oldest memorials such as the 1st Dynasty Palermo stone. But his cult is even older reaching back to the prehistoric era when he was a deity of fertility, sexual reproduction and natural phenomena such as storms. His erection is his most famous attribute — combined as it is with his raised arm and flail some have speculated that this is all part of an aggressive/protective posture. 

His main centres were Koptos (Kuft) & Panopolis (Akhmim). His symbols are the Thunderbolt, the White Bull, the Flail and the Phallus. Wallis Budge speculates there was also a lunar component to his cult. Min is also called ka-mwt-f “Bull of his mother” a reference to the incestuous impregnation of his mother, an epithet of various gods, including Horus, also Geb who kills his father Shu in order to ravage Tefnut. Before getting too outraged, it’s as well to remember this is an agricultural motif and refers to the reproductive activity of bulls and cows. Min’s archaic shrine was a phallic-shaped hut, woven from two significant and emblematic plants — the White Lotus & the (narcotic) Blue Lily (Nymphaea caerulea). 

The blossoms and foliage of these flowers are to be woven into a model phallus or perhaps a crown. The traditional hymns are referred to as “Danced”, implying they are rhythmic chants.

Danced Hymn for Min 

who is on his staircase

Hail to you, 

Min, Min Ra

Welcome

On your staircase

Hail to you

Min, Min Ra

And the crown you wear 

on your forehead

Hail to you 

Mysterious Min

“Bull of his mother”

Much that you do remains in obscurity

You are unique

To whom praise is given

You have power to give life 

To those you love

Powerful to give him to be propitiated

He is unique here

To whom has been conferred the function 

of the unknown god

While you go out of the great door

And are standing on your stairway of truth

Speaking with Osiris hour by hour

See, that which you ordain

For protection

Against all bad things

Min justified before your enemies

In the sky and on the earth

By the judges of all the gods

And all the goddesses.

NWT/ NUT/ NUIT & GEB

Nuit is the daughter of Shu and Tefnut. Her brother and husband is Geb. She had five children – Osiris, Set, Isis, Nephthys and Horus the Elder. She is considered one of the oldest deities in the Egyptian pantheon, with her origin being found in the creation story of Heliopolis. 

Her name means “The watery one” which may also symbolize the uterus. She represents the sky but not as the lifeless roof of heaven but as a dynamic entity, creating and destroying. She also represented the entire sky. Night and day as well as large features such as the Milky Way.

The female sky is the realm of the dead, whereas the Earth is for the living. This perhaps explains the male rulership of the Earth.

Nuit is intimately connected with the stars, especially those that are close to and appear to envelop our world. According to The Book of NWT, creation begins with the ambisexual Amun-Ra or Sungod Ra. he has the power to emanate part of himself, creating other Gods and Goddesses. He starts with Shu and Tefnut, who represent the principles of air and fire respectively. The process of emanation continues and they generate NWT the sky Goddess and Geb the Earth.

Nwt and Geb are locked together in a sexual embrace, almost a single entity. It is Shu, the God of the winds and the air who separates them, creating a space between all these elements in which our world can exist.

Geb was the Egyptian god of the earth and a mythological member of the Ennead of Heliopolis. He could also be considered a father of snakes. It was believed in ancient Egypt that Geb’s laughter created earthquakes and that he allowed crops to grow.

The oldest representation in a fragmentary relief of the god was as an anthropomorphic bearded being accompanied by his name, dating from king Djoser’s reign, 3rd Dynasty, and was found in Heliopolis. However, the god never received a temple of his own. In later times he could also be depicted as a ram, a bull or a crocodile.

Geb was frequently feared as the father of snakes (one of the names for snake was s3-t3 – “son of the earth”). In a Coffin Texts spell Geb was described as the father of the mythological snake Nehebkau of primaeval times. Geb could also be regarded as personified fertile earth and barren desert.

In the Heliopolitan Ennead (a group of nine gods created in the beginning by the one god Atum or Ra), Geb is the husband of Nwt, the sky or visible daytime and nightly firmament, the son of the earlier primordial elements Tefnut (moisture) and Shu (“emptiness”), and the father to the five lesser gods of the system – Osiris, Seth, Isis, Nephthys and Horus the Elder. In this context, Geb was believed to have originally been engaged with Nut and had to be separated from her by Shu, the god of the air. Consequently, in mythological depictions, Geb was shown as a man reclining, sometimes with his phallus still pointed towards Nwt. Geb and Nut together formed the permanent boundary between the primaeval waters and the newly created world.

His association with vegetation, healing and sometimes with the underworld and royalty brought Geb the occasional interpretation that he was the husband of Renenutet, a minor goddess of the harvest and also a mythological caretaker (the meaning of her name is “nursing snake”) of the young king in the shape of a cobra, who herself could also be regarded as the mother of Nehebkau, a primaeval snake god associated with the underworld.

Sources: 

Egyptian magick (Morgan: 2021) 

Demonic Calendar (Morgan: 2021)

 

Invocation of The 7th Head of the Dragon

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The Seven Heads of the Dragon are the foundational system of philosophy and practice of Apophis Club Initiates. Each head symbolises and embodies a layer of the primordial power of the Serpent.

The 7th head invocation was inspired by the book Apophis by Michael Kelly and the work curriculum of The Apophis club which was and still is a big influence on my way of thinking and being. 

Xepher!

APOPHIS By Michael Kelly

A practical handbook of Draconian Left-Hand Path Initiation. The Primordial Serpent lurks in the deepest, darkest roots of human consciousness. Each of its seven heads embodies a power which may be awakened within the psyche. ‘Apophis’ outlines the transformative process whereby the human Initiate becomes something much more than human. It provides the weapons necessary to win the war of consciousness against conformity. It openly teaches the means of immortalising the Self.

Invocation of the Typhon (2018)

The head of the Typhon or the ‘7th head’ represents the future self, the guardian angel, or the demon, your personal demon if you like.  

The head of Typhon was something I thought nobody would ever go through with, that is to say, I never imagine that anyone I know, let alone me, will ever go through with the invocation of all of the 7 heads. 

A few days before I set for the invocation I prepared my space by cleaning and sorting out everything I might need for the ritual. Music always helped me to focus when I need to plan a ceremony or an invocation, something about the rhythms of the tune I chose that afternoon is that before invoking one of the heads it is recommended to do the ritual of ‘opening the eye’ and then invoke myfutureself… 

Just to make it clear, by the time I felt ready to approach Typhon in a ritualistic way and invoke the 7th head, a few years have passed by, and the intense days of study and practice of the Apophis Club curriculum, were long behind me, and I was no more an active member of the club.

 Once you ‘open the eye’ and invoked your futureself it is the time to call upon one of the heads. There is no point leaving the eye open with no one to guide you through it – and by having your futureself about, the sense of security and reassurance to cross the abyss and reach out to the final head. I was a little nervous I must admit.

Am I really going to invoke the 7th head? 

It’s a myth, isn’t it? 

Deep breath, and here I am, getting ready to call upon Seth, the lord of darkness, the principle of ​Isolated intelligence, god of the Unknown future. 

Before midnight I started with banishing and soon realised I needed to repeat it a couple of times. Before I noticed I got carried away, and end up doing three different kinds of banishing — just to be on the safe side…  

You can take the girl out of the chaos, but you can’t take the chaos out of the girl… 

I went out to the garden altar and lit a candle and burned some incense and made a small offering of beer and bread. I put a little ​cake of light on the incense burner and looked up to the sky for the Ursa Major constellation. As soon as I saw Him, I stood in the Apophis and Typhon posture and chanted IAO for a little while. Satisfied, I went back inside and started singing and dancing, Open Up by P.I.L. Leftfield’s remix is always a favourite in raising the energies.  

 Earlier in the day I drew the sigil of the 7th head and mixed Dragon’s Blood powder into some red wine, I never tried it before, but what can be more symbolic than drinking actual dragon’s blood, especially when part of the invocation reads:  

‘Here I stand, initiate of the Dragon Mysteries…  And I am as you are, a void dweller.  The blood of the Dragon pulses through my veins;  My bones and flesh are of your substance’   

So I call upon my futureself, charge the dragon blood wine and drank it. 

It is stronger than I thought, the tingling sensation rushing through my veins. It’s time to invoke the Typhon.

I stare at the sigil and start chanting the words of the invocation. 

Everything becomes quiet for a few seconds, minutes, dead quiet. I’m not sure for how long I stood there until I felt something behind me.  It didn’t spook me, which is surprising.  

Seth is present in the room, I felt Him immediately, strong, stable and daring. Everything I say, he’s daring me to question and think it over. I find myself saying laud what needs to be done, speaking in such a confident way, using some hands and arms mudras like I was casting a spell. This led to a very bizarre conversation, between me, myfutureself and the Typhon. I started by saying all I needed to say to the Mighty Seth, and for one second, a thought crossed my mind — what are you doing woman? 

It was like staring into a mirror, into the void. I was staring into the eye, and I knew that now is the best time to say things as they are, that there is no god, apart from that I am a god/ess. We are partners in this journey, I do my bit, and you do yours. 

 I was trying to think about how I’m going to end this conversation when He just says; ‘Drink, Partner!’ and I’m thinking to myself, yes, ‘Partner’ sounds so much better than ‘My Lord’ or ‘Prince of Darkness’!  

 This might sound weird to you, but I’ve let you into my head now, and that’s the way things are in there.  

 Everything around me is slowing and quietening down, like I’m watching it all in slow motion, at times the sound of silence is quite alarming, my heart racing and then Typhon says, ‘I need some beer, so drink!’ 

​I knew I just did something incredible, but not sure what it was. We had some beer by the altar, then He said go, go and feel what it is like… 

 My blood is tingling and the music sends me far, far away. I lie on the sofa, I’m flying high with the music. The room is pretty dark but new thoughts and ideas keep bubbling up in my mind. I write them in my journal, like little messages, some private, some to share later.

I wait for the playlist to finish, before getting up and consigning the 7th head back to whence it came from. The circle is closed with as many banishings as I could remember and do. It is 4 am, and the sun is just coming up. I wind my whistle to the four corners, welcoming the new dawn. 

It is done!

***

That was a year ago, and what a year it was!

Soon after the invocation, I decided to leave my old job and at the same time, I got an offer for a much better one ( a dream job in a way at the time ). Before starting the new job I took a little holiday and went to Stonehenge for the Summer solstice, and what an amazing experience that was! A beautiful golden dawn, a good omen I would say. I found love, a soulmate and a magical partner and all in the same person! 

I went on the most fantastic holiday to Cairo, where we were very lucky to have the Red Pyramid at Dahshur to ourselves. We were the only people inside, so we took our chances and did a little ritual (our version of the open-the-mouth ritual) in the King’s chamber, at the heart of the pyramid!

We have been experimenting with crazy dream work, which gave us some very interesting results. And oh yes, there’s a book nearly finished,  in which you will find much more of my magical adventures in hyperspace reality…

So, it Is Done!

Xepher!

Renenutet

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It’s the 8th day after the full moon, Ugraparbah night, a night of radiating terror. The hunger is immense and the knowledge is out there, just reach out and let it flow through you, download it and upgrade yourself. 

So, it’s a day after the last quarter of the moon and finally, the time felt right for the Renanuteth invocation, the Serpent head goddess, the mother of all serpents. We kept delaying it, as she demanded an offering of that intoxicating smoke, one needs to be very certain of time, space and mind to offer it. 

The temple space is ready,  Zar music is playing in the background and on the altar between the burning candles a silver plate with a bunch of dry leaves, our offering, Salvia divinorum.

It’s been a year since we last journeyed into the Salvia dimension and I was very nervous to cross the gates of these ancient strange worlds again.

Some of you know that I’m an experienced traveller in hyperspace and in some of the galaxies and constellations I travelled to, I feel at home, (ayahuasca, mushrooms, peyote, San Pedro, to name a few) but Salvia, is a whole different story. 

We opened the space and read the invocation:

Thōzo pithē etc  (Thermouthe Pythia)

Thermouthē

The doors are open

And seven virgins 

Shall arise from the deep earth

Their garments of purest linen

Their faces those of serpents

You are the fates of heaven

Wielding golden wands

Welcome

Hail thou seven fates of heaven

O noble and good virgins

O sacred ones 

Hail thou chrepsienthaēs?

Hail thou menescheēs

Hail thou mechran!

Hail thou ararmachēs

Hail thou echommiē

Hail thou tichnondaēs

Hail thou erou rombriesē

Hail thou seven

snake-headed goddesses

The fates of heaven

The goddesses who hold the pole in its place

Thozopithe formula

Hail thou bear goddess,

Great one

 ruling heaven. 

Reigning over the pole of the stars. 

Hail Highest one, 

beautiful-shining goddess. 

Whose element is Incorruptible. 

Hail thous Composite of the all, 

The all-illuminating, 

bond of the universe

You who stand on the pole, you who the lord god appointed to turn the holy pole with a strong hand. 

The first offering 

As soon as the first offering is done, I noticed a very subtle movement, like ripples of heat and colour emanating from the altar. I look around the room, there’s a strange glow all around the fireplace.

The colour-heat ripples around the altar are getting bigger and before I realise what is happening a wave of serpent-like fractal shapes and colours are flowing over me. I try to stay calm, letting the serpent aura engulf me. Yeah… stay calm, I keep hearing myself mumbling…

Something is moving along the altar, two serpents, one black and the other colourful.  Both glowing and moving (flowing?) down the altar along the wall towards the fireplace. The coloured serpent disappeared in the fire, and the black serpent stopped at the left of the fireplace and erected itself. Beautiful, fearsome, awesome, terrifying. Her flaming eyes pierced mine with a hypnotic gaze.

I tried to shift my gaze, to move a little but I was frozen with awe and terror. She’s getting closer, her aura is so bright and huge I can nearly touch it (that if I wasn’t freaking out here, my heart is racing. I think I’m going to faint.) Wait, she’s communicating with me. I can hear a strange whisper echoing inside my head, an ancient serpentine language vibrating down my spine. She’s taking over me, crawling up and down inside my body.

I can’t take it anymore, I cry out and fall down to my knees, I can hear myself praying in her ancient language.

Praying for mercy

Crying my heart out for Her to spare my life.

She’s gone.

My Serpent queen. 

The Second Offering 

Still shaking, I place the second offering on the altar. The smoke is thick and white.

The music is rhythmic, hypnotic, wild and tribal. I can feel it in my bones like the rhythm is part of me. I hear the ‘mama song’ and I can feel them, my three beautiful mamas, dancing around me, opening the gates for me, making me see.  The Zar company are here, with their drums and songs. His Holiness, the Nubian priest is there too. So majestic in his white robes. He stretches his arm out and invites me to approach. The music stopped and everything went quiet. 

Stillness, like we are all frozen between time and space.

The air is crackling with static electricity and energy, it feels like we are trapped in a teardrop that is gonna explode any moment now.

Cacophonia. 

An explosion of sounds, screams and shouts, and crazy rhythms are turning slowly into music and songs, these ancient songs and hypnotic rhythms I’ve heard before. The music gets louder and louder it takes over me, it’s in me, it’s coming from inside me, I am the music.

The black mama took me by the hand and started to dance. We are dancing. Blue mama is to my right and red mama to my left. More people joining in and circling us, with their drums and bells, all dancing the wild ecstatic dance. I can feel something behind me, not sure what, it sends shivers down my spine. Black mama holding my hands tight looking into my eyes and smiling, whispering in her ancient language, “keep dancing habibti”. I close my eyes and I dance and spin, I can’t feel my body, there is something on my back, I freak out but black mama’s hands are squeezing mine reassuring me to keep dancing, so I find my rhythm and let go, I  can fly. I can see the company from above in a dancing frenzy, the Nubian priest is on his knees praying and crying, the three mamas spinning like mad dervishes. 

All of these are orchestrated by the elder of the company. He is standing in the middle of all the maddens, a big grin on his face drumming his magickal drum and shouting mad order towards the sky.

I can feel he’s calling me, I can feel his drumming vibrating in my ears and heart, and I hear shouting and wild screams. Black mana’s grip is tightening around mine and I can feel her pulling me down.

I crash back to the here and now.

The Third Offering 

At this point, I’m weary and tired, but there’s no way back, it has to be done.

I inhale the smoky essence of the offering and lean back into the fluffy white clouds.

There’s a huge wheel in the distance. The wheel rotates slowly as if spinning in a very slow motion. With each rotation of the wheel, it seems that I’m moving forward towards it like it’s pulling me nearer to it somehow. 

I look down at my feet and realize that I am attached to the wheel like Leonardo de Vinci’s The Vitruvian Man.

As soon as I understand that I’m attached to the wheel, it starts to spin faster and faster. I can see myself spinning, turning, becoming an endless spiral of Fibonacci numbers, and fractals.

I close my eyes and think to myself “I can relax now”

Boom, I’m back in the room.

We closed the circle, taking extra care to see the portal tightly shut, and making sure that no strange entities lurked in the shadows. 

I don’t know when I’ll go through this portal again.